In the 1950’s people envisioned the 1980’s as the age of moon colonization and everyday space travel amid continued cold war shenanigans.
Along that timeline the Foo corporation and its subsidiary, Nucleo have dominated the market and a new head of the company, Mr. Salt, plans to take it to the next level by building the first lunar theme park and resort.
But The Green family next door might present a challenge as Grandpa tightens his tin foil hat and enlists the help of Little Johnny and Suzy in finding out the secret of what’s lurking in the Salt’s basement and really driving the Foo Corporation to dominate the lunar tourist industry.
Six people find themselves trapped in Detention, a nightmare realm where the demonic Schoolmaster is hell-bent on reforming them . . . until they die.
Porn superstar Venus Deluxe came to Springfield, MA to party, and next found her life hanging by a thread. One wrong answer will mean her death.
Suspended BPD detective Tanya Rockford was trying to stop one kind of violence, but found a terrifying another. With her and her companion’s lives hanging in the balance, it’s going to take all of her courage and resourcefulness to escape this hell she’s stumbled into.
Porn stud Chad Cannon has made a career from his ten-inch penis. Here in Detention, however, it’s his brains that matter. He’ll soon be hoping all the pot he’s smoked over the years hasn’t completely messed up his memory.
The three students, Sherri, Jordan, and Mike? They were all just in the wrong place at the right time.
Will anyone survive Detention? The evil Schoolmaster doesn’t plan on letting that happen . . .
Reality has henceforth been abolished
– The Fixer.
In Springfield, Massachusetts, Melanie Catchpole is hired to fetch back a magic teddy bear worth millions of dollars from a warehouse across town.
Problem is, the warehouse is down in Springfield’s O-Zone—that totally weird sector of the city where Bizarro fell to Earth. The ‘O’ is a fairytale land, a place where dreams and nightmares literally live and breathe.
Worse still, the gingers—mutant cannibals—prowl the O. The gingers have already eaten everyone else Melanie’s employers sent to get back the magic teddy bear.
Accompanied by the handsome but ruthless Doug Fisher (who she finds sexy but doesn’t dare entrust her heart to), Melanie enters the O-Zone.
Melanie and Doug are instantly caught up in an adventure they’d never have believed credible even if written as fiction . . . and Melanie’s used to experiencing the very weird as the norm.
And now, additionally, there’s a mystery to unravel: What does the dark, freezing-cold being called The Fixer want with Mary, the barkeep’s daughter?
Ruled by a committee of Hags, and fueled by toothless rivalries, Black County lurks just far enough out of the way to be completely unnoticed by the rest of civilization. Its inhabitants have been mentally warped for generations and the land itself seems to have the power to drive anyone unlucky enough to visit into ridiculous hillbilly madness.
When a construction company needs to bury a pipeline through its ludicrous hills and valleys, a twisted charm goes to work and every aspect of already bizarre Black County life takes a gory turn for the hysterical. Take a preposterous trip along with its citizens, both native and new, through escapades such as the Hag parade, the grand opening of Madame Skunk’s House of Ill Repute, the demolition derby riot and the rabid, zombie clown apocalypse.
Buy it today on amazon:
Now available – THE FILING CABINET OF DOOM – a collection of 17 Bizarro stories.
What is THE FILING CABINET OF DOOM?
It’s a surreal comedy set in a black and white world where people communicate via speech bubbles and no sound exists. During a visit by a traveling carnival a psychic informs a village that the world will end soon. Three people make their way to the Head Office of the Council – a distant and dangerous place – to find out what’s going on while the psychic stays behind to face the wrath of the villagers.
In addition to the novella bearing the collection’s title, this book is JAM PACKED with sixteen BONUS short stories of the bizarre for your perusal, including:
- Amongst the Dust and the Mice
- Care For a Dance?
- Dimension Lake
- Feathers and Fame
- Girl in the Picture
- I Can See You
- Invite Ghosts and Earn Pounds
- My Own Real Doll
- One Phone Call Away
- Son, I’m Afraid I’m a Zombie
- The Annual Essex Medical Convention
- The Blue Seashell
- The Marzipan King is a Dick
- The Problem Rock
- Time Tastic Tours
- We Interrupt With This Message
From the man who brought you VEGAN ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE and BOSTON POSH, comes…
VEGAN VAMPIRE VAGINAS
The biggest bank heist in US history. And Tom Palmer can’t remember pulling it off. And no, this isn’t your standard case of amnesia.
After a one-night-stand gone horribly wrong, Boston salesman Tom Palmer wakes up with a vagina implanted in his left hand.
Then his day gets worse:
Tom is transported across space-time to a nightmare version of Boston, one where the Bizarro virus has transformed half the population into cannibals.
Worst of all, Tom discovers that in this new Boston, he’s the infamous gangster Pussypalm, wanted for robbing the Federal Reserve Bank of Boston a year ago.
He also learns that the vagina in his hand is prophetic, i.e. it talks . . . after sex.
With 130 people left dead during his bank heist and six billion dollars missing, Tom knows he’s living on borrowed time. It is in his best interests not to remember anything.
Because once he does . . .
But then everything gets so much odder. Tom begins remembering what has to be someone else’s life. Or is it?
Vegan Vampire Vaginas: A mind-bending trip through Bizarro America!
Why are the white robots trying to kill Malone?
In 2028 AD, the USA is a nation ravaged by hungry dragons and dinosaurs.
In Boston, Massachusetts, private eye Bud Malone is hired to rescue a kidnapped heiress. But nothing is as it seems.
Malone works to unravel a tangled web involving Boston Chinatown, a 200-year-old woman with a 9-year-old body, white humanoid robots, a human-liver-eating psychopath, a golem, a porcelain dragon, and a snake goddess with a crush on him.
There’s also a woman obsessed with chicken sex.
Then Malone meets Posh Lane, a gorgeous call girl who’s desperate to quit her pimp. Romantic sparks ignite between Posh and Malone, but Posh’s past suddenly catches up with her in a BIG way.
To save Posh, Malone agrees to run a quest for Earth’s new rulers, the Forks. The quest: recover ex US president Jefferson Lincoln’s liver for them.
Malone has no idea that agreeing to the Fork’s odd request will send him on the weirdest trip he’s ever been on in his life.